One Prostitute's Battle With Under-Stomach Swamp Rot

🦠 On Today’s Show:

• 🧼 Our favorite prostitute returns with tales of Middle Eastern dick, armpit funk, and under-stomach swamp rot

• 🍞 A woman makes a peanut butter & jelly sandwich during her virtual court appearance—the judge is not amused

• 📘 Tim receives an AI-generated novel featuring himself, mystical horses, and cum fart strategy meetings at Red Lobster

• 🐍 A Florida man gets bitten by a rattlesnake and records it all in hopes of viral fame—leg nearly rots off, but worth it for the views

• 🦝 Kentucky man uses a raccoon as a weapon of retail disruption—follows up a previous crime spree on a mule

• 🧑‍⚖️ Predator catchers make a fat pedo do jumping jacks while begging for mercy—his main concern? Broken headphones

• 🗣️ Listener voicemails on masturbation technique, paper towels vs. fleshlights, and an impassioned defense of technical ephebophilia

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📦 Featured Image Today:
The cover of The Horse Whisper Chronicles: The Tales of Timothy Bethesda Henson — AI-generated masterpiece starring Tim, Unicorn Hamster, Tone-Deaf Sean, and the villainous Squirtteenth Birthday

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🧠 Programming Notes:

• 📼 Friday = Best-Of Episode

• 🏇 Full audiobook readings of Horse Whisper Chronicles may be coming to the Sideshow soon

• 🐴 Learn how to publish your own dumb AI-generated novel at bookbyanyone.com

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• 🤡 Become a true freak and gain access to exclusive shows: DistortedView.com

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